fancycwabs: (Default)
2010-02-15 09:15 am

I was also called an egotistical self-promoter!

On Monday, February 1, I received the second message via Twitter that I'd been nominated for special recognition. The first time was nearly a year ago when one of my Twitter posts had been selected for the funny-tweets-compilation Twitter Wit, but this was completely different. COMPLETELY different.

Apparently I'd been selected to be a Memphis Hottie.

Yes, you read that right. Stop laughing.

Some (as yet anonymous) person had graded me like a piece of meat and determined that I was USDA Prime, although not because of the rich marbling, for once.

Tuesday was the phone interview, a whole bunch of softball questions that you can read in the article. Wednesday was the photoshoot at Ernestine and Hazel's a former brothel that's really a great (and appropriate, considering) location for portrait photography. Photographers normally contort me into awkward positions that make me feel self-conscious, and it shows in photographs, but I was pretty comfortable, and I think the portrait turned out well (folks have said as much).

Then I got to wait a week and not tell every single person I know what was going to happen--although I couldn't resist telling a few odd folks. The article came out, a handful of folks offered congratulations and notes of surprise (including an administrator at the school, just a second ago), we had a nice party at the Hi-Tone, and I have a lanyard badge certifying my hotness.

After the article and the party, I got an email from Mom, who apparently had gotten the news from my sister, which read:
Congratulations on being a Memphis Hottie. I've always thought you were a hottie. Just be careful; don't believe "hot" women when they say they are disease free and on birth control. Often, they lie. Smile.

And with the awkward squickiness of that, the universe was restored to its proper balance.
fancycwabs: (Pimp)
2010-02-04 08:43 pm

[tiny filter] You read it here first.

Okay, nobody reading this lives in Memphis, or knows Memphians (to my knowledge), but some of you might be amused or intrigued by this, so I think I'm safe in giving away this seekrit bit of information:

Every year the local alternative weekly picks a handful of folks that they label "Memphis Hotties." If you check the bottom of the linked article from last year, you'll notice a certain familiar blue crab avatar and a jokey comment lamenting being passed over.

This year, I will not be able to make that comment. Official announcement once I can link to this year's article, which should be a week from now.
fancycwabs: (Default)
2010-01-12 11:43 pm


Today I was called a narcissist, which seems like the most unlikely label that could conceivably be applied to someone with a generally negative self-image, but maybe it fits. Anyone want to weigh in with an opinion on what I think of myself? Am I too self-absorbed?
fancycwabs: (Fuck it)
2009-12-14 05:40 am

The day of judgement has arrived!

I've been teaching English for the past month without any idea what sort of curriculum I should be covering outside of "American Literature, and how to write a 5-paragraph essay, that they inexplicably call a 3.5 Essay." I had no idea what they covered already in the textbook, so I jumped in and started covering the transcendentalists: Emerson, Thoreau, etc. The kids were bored out of their mind, but the unit wraps up with Martin Luther King, so I thought it might eventually hit home. Today I'll be teaching "Letter from Birmingham City Jail" and persuasive techniques. Or trying to, since I can't get the students to behave at all.

Oh, and I'll be being observed in class by the principal. It will never be more apparent that I have no idea what I'm doing than it will be today. I know my material (in English. Not so much in creative writing or journalism, where I've never taken a class in my life.) If not for the school's desperation for teachers, I would expect to find myself out of a job this afternoon. I might still.

At least when I was teaching math I felt like I wasn't completely faking my way through it. Here, I feel like a fraud. Not that I'm not busting my ass to try to do a good job, but an engineer gets completely different training than a teacher does.

Anyway, any positive thoughts you can send my way between 12:45 and 2:15 this afternoon couldn't hurt, right?
fancycwabs: (Fuck it)
2009-11-12 03:46 pm

A primadon? A divo?

So I've been rehearsing for a few weeks to perform the role of Daddy Warbucks in Annie, and got an email today telling me my performance schedule (there are two casts) for the two December weekends that the show runs.

I have Saturday and Sunday matinees and one Thursday night performance.

I am apparently the Understudy Warbucks. For this I have to shave my fucking head.
fancycwabs: (Pimp)
2009-09-11 09:27 am

(no subject)

Is He Dead? opens tonight. Like every show, there are some directorial decisions I would have made differently (I really dislike when someone tries to insert their own jokes into an otherwise-perfectly-serviceable script. It's like telling Mark Twain and David Ives that they could have made the script funnier, if only they'd tried hard enough), but when I don't necessarily like something, it's my job to suck it up and "trust the director's vision." Or whatever.

The last show I recall seeing that had a director who thought she was funnier than the author was Theatre Memphis' abysmal production of Picasso at the Lapin Agile, and that show won award after award. Even the local theatre critic thought that was a very good production, and I would have left at intermission if it hadn't been a one-act, so what do I know? Maybe the same critic will also really like Is He Dead?

The test audiences have been laughing, anyway. And it's not a bad show by any means, it's just very heavy-handed where I think the material might have been better served with a light touch. Anyway, the director thinks its great, audiences are enjoying it, so y'all oughta come out and see it! We run through September 27, so there's plenty of time to schedule your road trip!
fancycwabs: (Fuck it)
2009-08-23 11:08 am

See userpic.

Those of you who follow me on Twitter knew it the instant it happened, and facebook shortly thereafter, but for the rest of yous, I got laid off on Friday. Zero notice, zero severance, just a prayer for God to take care of us since the company sure as hell wouldn't be.

First time I've been jobless since just after graduation from college, sixteen years ago, but I didn't have actual bills to pay back then.

I've got a handful of places to send resumes to. One of the bright sides of being on Twitter and involved in theater is that I know A LOT of people--I had a "send your resume to XXX" a scant four hours after I sent out the notice that I'd gotten laid off, and probably a half dozen leads on job vacancies around town via friends and acquaintances. Just glad that engineering is a marketable skill.

Anyway, it's the weekend, nobody's up in HR anywhere, but tomorrow morning I start my new job looking for jobs. If anyone has leads, ideas, or wants to buy me a drink when they're passing through town I'm all for it.
fancycwabs: (Default)
2009-08-13 10:59 am

Google Voice

I think most of y'all have my cell phone number anyway, but for posterity's sake, my Google Voice number is 901-257-9125. Feel free to call, although please to be refraining from doing so at 3am, even though it looks like I'm online and awake.
fancycwabs: (Default)
2009-08-06 01:48 pm

What I've been up to:

  • Rehearsals for Is He Dead? have begun, and while some of it is very funny, other parts of it are being directed in the most heavy-handed, over-the-top way possible. Also, we still don't have a full cast. It's early, though, and the theatre audiences (excluding myself) LOVE LOVE LOVE over-the-top performances, so there's that.

  • I went to a dress rehearsal for the local premiere of The 25th Annual Putnam County Spelling Bee last night, and it was pretty good, although they completely blow the best joke in the show by trying to tell it no fewer than four times. Also, they added an intermission (to a 90-minute show) for some reason.

  • Opera Memphis chorus assignments will be coming out within a week. I'm vibrating in anticipation, although there's a strong chance that I won't be needed. 40 total chorus roles over the season = 20 males = 10 baritones, BUT the most chorus roles in any one production is 14 / 7 / 3.5, and I'm sure they've got more than 3.5 baritones to choose from (although I can easily sing tenor). Anyway, we'll see what happens!

  • I'm gonna be singing the national anthem before the Tennessee Roller Derby bout on Saturday. I asked if I should dress up fancy, but they seemed indifferent to the idea.

  • The Memphis Theatre Awards are in four weeks and change. Once again, I'm not nominated, but it still promises to be a good time (and a better time than last year, as my ex- is reportedly once again going to Burning Man, but this time I'm not paying for it, nor answer any awkward questions about her whereabouts).
fancycwabs: (Fuck it)
2009-07-23 12:28 pm


Dear friend,

It's okay to be a Republican. Even a conservative, if you think you can justify it through rational means. But the endless string of Coulter-esque trolling on facebook and outright hateful language towards the people who call you a friend make me question your moral compass. When your politics comes at the expense of your ability to understand and sympathize with your fellow man, even if you disagree with them, perhaps it's time to reconsider your politics.

I apologize if the forthcoming "unfriending" is going to hurt your feelings. Doubtless it will add to your persecution complex. Unfortunately, we're judged by the company we keep, and life's too short to deal with angry bigots.

I'll be there if you ever actually need help. I always have been.

fancycwabs: (Default)
2009-07-05 01:37 pm

You'll need to reset the security fence on my freezer

Jolly Rancher popsicles.

Yes, I'm playing God with foodstuffs again. This couldn't possibly end badly.
fancycwabs: (Fuck it)
2009-06-10 10:45 pm

(Confidants filter) It's heartbreaking to read

Based on what I'm reading on facebook, it appears that my ex-wife has kicked my daughter out of the house. It seems that the catastrophes in their lives didn't stop when I was taken out of the picture.
Long angsty rant from a teenager, but based on what I know about Amy, I have no reason to doubt that any of it is true )
fancycwabs: (Chicken)
2009-06-05 10:32 am


The review of my ex's new-name stage debut:
  1. Is difficult to find on the internets.
  2. Doesn't mention her or her partner at all (her partner, especially, has a GIANT EGO and will take it hard).
  3. Is pretty "damning with faint praise."
I've written the leads notes on facebook to congratulate them.
fancycwabs: (Default)
2009-04-30 02:25 pm

Memory Map

For those of you not reading elsewhere, yesterday I created a map of my first twenty-four years, give or take. It's still a work in progress, but was a lot of fun to make--a little wistful, a little cathartic, and a lot of what makes me who I am.

I recommend making your own, whether you share it with the rest of us or not. It's a useful way to document your existence, and a novel way to bring a sense of narrative to your life.

The cartography of my life isn't in any particular order--outside of the order I entered 'em, but I'll arrange it to give it some flow and narrative when I've got a few more entries in.
fancycwabs: (Default)
2009-03-27 01:40 pm

Just postin' from Prague

Today I was going to visit Franz Kafka's grave, which is but a short walk from [ profile] phonemonkey and [ profile] antiquated_tory's place, but arrived to discover that the Jewish cemetary closed at 2 so folks can get ready for shabbas. So instead I wandered back through the Christian cemetary with its ivy-covered tombstones and flowerbeds maintained by loved ones. Some of the sites are fascinating, so I thought I'd show you guys one that's bound to have a story behind it:

Prague Cemetary (Christian) (17)

Perhaps that is Josef Barak, but there are lots of other Baraks in Prague, so I could be wrong.
fancycwabs: (Default)
2009-03-16 08:36 am

A reminder:

MOST of my posts not discussing either my horrible marriage or the size of my butt are going over at