Haunt me no more, spirit.

Back in town--I meant to mention this earlier during the run of A Christmas Carol but I forgot to.

During the scenes with the Ghost of Christmas Past, Scrooge and the Spirit take a stop by Scrooge's old boarding school, where the students (in our production, but not that I remember in the story) put on an anachronistic Christmas Pageant that gets lots of laughs when the angel appears and shouts TA-DA! and when the sheep talk. Young Scrooge plays Herod in this pageant. Afterwards all the other students go home for the holidays, and Scrooge is left alone.

The Ghost of Christmas Past and Scrooge then have a conversation which doesn't go in either of these two manners, but it should:

Wrong way to end the scene 1:
GCP: A child, left all alone.
SCROOGE: Not all alone, you see how I entertain myself.
Young Scrooge pulls out his penis and begins masturbating furiously.

Wrong way to end the scene 2:
GCP: A child, left all alone.
SCROOGE: Not all alone, you see how I entertain myself.
GCP: With a book.
Young Scrooge pulls out a copy of Atlas Shrugged.
SCROOGE: Ayn Rand, Ann Coulter, Ron Paul, they were all very real to me.
GCP: You know, this actually explains a LOT.

This is why they don't let me direct.

(Some of the people in the cast actually got the second joke. Not many, but Scrooge thought it was funny.)