On Basketball.

Memphis is a middle aged trailer park wife of a city, a girl who wasn't the brightest in the high school, got knocked up, dropped out, and went to work in the Kroger bakery misspelling names on birthday cakes. Her husband occasionally gets drunk on Busch Light and yells at her, blaming her for his own unrealized dreams. Years of smoking Benson & Hedges Menthol Light 100's, and a little weed, have worn her voice and hollowed her cheeks, and years of laying out in the back yard (as it were) have made her leathery. She doesn't have an internet connection, but she does have Direct TV--she built a fence and planted a little garden around the dish standing free in the yard, as the trailer moves too much when it gets windy.

Memphis winning the NCAA National Championship would be like this woman, during a month with five paydays in it, winning $500 in a "The Price is Right" slot machine at a riverboat casino. It's not gonna change anything, but there will be ONE HELL OF A PARTY.