I'd better gorge myself while I can, right?

[fancycwabs]

I had lunch in Mississippi today--catfish, green beans, purple hull peas, and corn. Because of my diet, it was the largest meal I'd had in a while. It was delicious, and I'm gonna pretend it was healthy. It may not be long before I'll have to get my catfish on this side of the state line.

Apparently some old-school lawmaker in Mississippi has decided that it would be a bad idea to feed fatties in restaurants, and written a law to prohibit the practice, although I wonder if he just to a 1963 law, crossed out the word "black" and substituted "obese." Of course, it's not as if Mississippi has a history of discrimination or anything.

If passed, this law would basically shut down the riverboat casino buffets, and naturally a system of back-alley fried chicken, barbecue, and catfish joints will spring up, where the obese can get their deliciousness fix.

Smoking in restaurants is still acceptable in Mississippi, incidentally, but not in Tennessee. So you'll have to pick either the vice of gluttony or nicotine addiction; to have both means you can't eat anywhere.

Comments

[box-of-rocks.livejournal.com]

I can't believe that law has been written - how totally nuts. I'm sure the restaurants would love for it to be passed, considering Mississippi is like 28% obese. And how would they enforce it? A scale and a BMI chart? What about the drivethrough? My face doesn't look fat so I bet I could pass as a skinny person through the driveup. Or maybe they can do something where if 3 of your grandparents are thin, you are thin. Or there could be a Jim Crowe test! Oh, the possibilities. And can fat people still work in the restaurant? Maybe fat people could hire thin people to smuggle them a burger. Could we still get Subway, 'cuz that's how Jared lost weight? What if you get subway but you want the cheesy herb bread and mayonaise?

With the last 5 pounds I've gained, I would now officially be banned from fast food too.

[loree-borealis.livejournal.com]

Athletes and pregnant women would also be excluded according to the BMI since people with a large proportion of muscle or other non-fat body mass* are also considered obese. They'd need at least a ruler and a scale, because everybody knows how easy it is to determine a person's BMI by looking at them.

*by "other non-fat body mass" I mean "fetus"

Rachel on The F-Word asks, "for all of you who doubt fat is one of the last acceptable forms of discrimination, what say you now?"

[redtheblue.livejournal.com]

The best thing to arise from all of this: Vice squads in fat suits. Eddie Murphy can now find work as a law enforcement consultant.

[cabbagemedley.livejournal.com]

It's gotta be a desensitising tactic so they can pass less-bullshit-but-still-bullshit legislation later on, For Our Own Good. Gee thanks.

I propose an eat-in.