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Yesterday I picked up The Book of Fate by Brad Meltzer as a popcorn read in the style of Dan Brown, presuming that it would probably suck in the style of Dan Brown, but that it would be mildly amusing. Meltzer's acknowlegements page seems to indicate that he did some research, but the end of Chapter 1 (which is essentially a prologue) indicates that the things he didn't research (and probably the things he did, too) are unintentionally (I'm guessing) hilarious.
A quote (going from memory here): "A woman's scream was a perfect C-minor chord."
Picture that for a moment. A presidential assassination attempt (I'm spoiling nothing here, trust me) at the Pepsi 400, thousands of cheering fans, and our hero in the confusion picks out a woman screaming either:
A. In three tones simultaneously (perhaps they bring in some sweet adelines for the scene), or
B. In varying pitches of C, Eb, and G. In which case it's an arpeggio
I never thought I'd see the day when Dan Brown's writing looked like Pynchon next to someone else, but damn.
A quote (going from memory here): "A woman's scream was a perfect C-minor chord."
Picture that for a moment. A presidential assassination attempt (I'm spoiling nothing here, trust me) at the Pepsi 400, thousands of cheering fans, and our hero in the confusion picks out a woman screaming either:
A. In three tones simultaneously (perhaps they bring in some sweet adelines for the scene), or
B. In varying pitches of C, Eb, and G. In which case it's an arpeggio
I never thought I'd see the day when Dan Brown's writing looked like Pynchon next to someone else, but damn.
no subject
Date: 2006-09-18 09:35 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-09-18 09:45 pm (UTC)And why C-minor?
And how could the narrarator tell?
Maybe his perfect pitch comes into play later in the book. I'll let you know if I don't set it ablaze in a bit of wrath later.
no subject
Date: 2006-09-18 09:58 pm (UTC)Actually I believe Sandry can sing at least two notes at once. But it doesn't matter, because in the end it's all about space aliens.
no subject
Date: 2006-09-18 11:29 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-09-18 09:44 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-09-18 09:48 pm (UTC)Do they sing the national anthem before NASCAR events? It would be another point in favor of "not a real sport" if they didn't.
no subject
Date: 2006-09-18 11:30 pm (UTC)