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Wal-Mart to sell religious action figures

"Take that, Superman!"
"Oh no! Doomsday's killed Superman!"
"Wait! Here comes Jesus!"
"Why do you weep, Lois? Superman isn't dead, he merely sleeps!"
"Jesus raised Superman from the dead! Hooray!"
"Using Jesus is CHEATING Billy! I don't want to play with you anymore."

Date: 2007-07-17 02:47 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] dolphinsolo.livejournal.com
And this is why I love Orlando - this is our local news.

Date: 2007-07-17 03:12 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] fancycwabs.livejournal.com
I'm using him EVERYWHERE. Especially with my Ratatouille action figures.

"Oh Linguini, what are we going to do? Anton Ego's in the restaurant, and we've run out of wine!"
"Colette, run down to the store and pick up a bottle of...wait, who's that running into the kitchen? It's Jesus! Can you help us, Jesus?"
"Linguini, my son, pour water into these clay pots, and send it out to Ego."
"But, but...okay, whatever you say Jesus."
-Moments later-
"I took the pots of water to Ego, and he said it was the best wine he ever tasted!"
"The restaurant is saved! Thank you, Jesus!"

Date: 2007-07-17 06:42 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] mybadhairlife.livejournal.com
You mean these will be better than the Canadian History action figures? Better than Sir John A MacDonald complete with complimentary brown book-thing-attachment??

Date: 2007-07-18 02:36 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] luckimunki.livejournal.com
And this is why you are universally adored.

Date: 2007-07-19 12:35 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] bigbrownhound.livejournal.com
I predict that they will be pulled off the shelves quickly.

When my little ones were little-er I often wondered why they didn't make toy Baby Jesuses. I found my answer when the littlest named one of her babies Jesus. Doomed to hell at a very young age.

Date: 2007-07-19 12:38 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] bigbrownhound.livejournal.com
Will the Samson doll come with plenty of Philistines to murder and with directions on committing suicide? YAY! Samson! He's my HERO!

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