Unrelated items, unordered list.

• Diet has me down thirteen pounds in two weeks (9 + 4). This week had a few days of stasis, fueled by alcohol consumption and Valentine's Day. This week should have fewer opportunities to deviate from the plan, but really I shouldn't be losing more than 4 lbs a week in any case. Coworkers remarked on weight loss, which was affirming.


• Daytona 500 was yesterday. Coworkers are glad pleased that the "American" car manufactured in Canada beat the "Japanese" car manufactured in Kentucky. I also understand that a white guy won again.


• Last Tuesday before meeting redtheblue I stopped in Madison Avenue Tobacco (located on Union Avenue). It was some thirty degrees out, and the wind was blowing pretty fiercely, so I remarked at the cold. The fiftyish black man smoking and watching television looked up, pulled the cigar from his mouth, and said "You KNOW it's cold when the white folks are complaining."


• I'm playing the Ze Frank Puzzle Challenge. Don't know if the puzzles are getting progressively easier, or if I (and others, apparently) are becoming more adept at this particular form of codebreaking. Anyone else?


• Still sending out the occasional random amusing (to me, anyway) text message. So far, I haven't called anyone and tried to sell them anything. If anyone out there isn't getting obscure messages on their cell phones, and would like to get same, drop your number in the comments (screened), or send your number (and LJ name, please) to my phone via the link on my info page.

We were doing the thing I'd rather not say...

Back in 1990 I played Orsino in a production of Twelfth Night in Mobile, with a couple of local lawyers playing Malvolio and Toby Belch. Before one performance, the actor playing Belch related the following story*:

...So the defense attorney's got this guy on the stand, and he's supposed to be providing his client with an alibi for the robbery.

"You say the client was with you on (the date in question)?"

"Yes sir, he was with me."

"What we you doing together?"

"I'd really rather not say."

"I'm afraid you have to tell us."

The witness looks at the judge. "Do I have to?"

The judge nods.

"Oh, you know." Here, the witness makes a gesture by making a fist, turning it palm up in front of his chest, and moving it back and forth in what probably means something else in ASL. The court reporter doesn't have keys on the thingamabob to accurately reflect common gesture for masturbation.

"You were WHAT?" The lawyer's eyes got fairly wide.

"Do I have to say it?"

"YES, YOU HAVE TO SAY IT"

"You know," The witness makes the gesture again, "Dice."

Now you know the rest of the story.

*Not actually a verbatim quote, here. It has been sixteen years, after all.

You know, I've never actually been to Benihana

On a whim I went to the Wheel of Lunch and instead of having it recommend "lunch" or "food" I had it find "strippers." Supposedly at one time there was a strip club on the first floor of our building. Anyway, it turned up the following:

• Good Times Escort


• Christie's Cabaret


• Gentlemen's Club


• Pony


• Shannon Ward (An escort, I presume)


• Babes Show Club


• Benihana

Is there something going on at Benihana of which I'm unaware? I always thought the "show" involved teppanyaki, but perhaps I've been misinformed.